JIM “PAPPY” MOORE: Persnickety Jim

Emails are my preferred form of communication. You can write out exactly what you want to communicate. You don’t have to worry about accidentally bumping the wrong button and sending your message before you’re ready to send it. You can put thought into it. You can write it, then let it sit there a bit, then decide if you want to change it or even start all over. You can make sure it says what you want it to say. And you have a record of exactly what you said. You don’t have that in telephone conversations or personal face-to-face conversations. People can misremember and believe you said something different than you said. Writing it out in an email and keeping it is how you know exactly what you said, and what you didn’t say. They stack up in a file in chronological order, and are easily located later.

Texts are not like that. Sending someone a text is the same as your kid or grand-kid coming up to you while you’re busy and suddenly tugging on your arm and immediately breaking into whatever it is you are doing. You may be watching news, or watching some favorite show that is on NOW, or watching a game that is tied and you really, really want to watch it instead of conversing with someone who just got the urge to text with you.

You are typing your intended text to someone else and you bump the wrong button and ZOOM, it is gone. Now you have to pick up where you left off and finish writing it. You never know if the person on the other end is busy, or sleeping, or driving, or watching their favorite TV or game. What you know for sure is that you don’t know if you’re being a pest by sending that text. You do know if it will interrupt whatever it is they are doing. That’s why texts are not my favored method of communication. “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.” Those are words I live by, and in my opinion words we should all live by.

There are a handful of people I will text with, very close friends or relatives where we know we need to check in for one reason or another, or to get information that is current. Like the all important sports events. “You watching this mess?” That’s only for the closest people who share your love of Astros, or Rockets, or Cowboys, or Texans, or Panthers. It’s the never-ending conversation that needs no introduction. You’re either watching or you’re not, and the only purpose is to find out if you’re watching this mess and are getting disgusted, or are insanely happy.

Some are relatives such as my son, or nephew, or sister, and are about who is going to be where and when, and is now a good time to figure it out? “Let me know when you wanna talk about it.” We like these because everyone knows there is no hurry and you get to it when you’re ready to get to it. If you send an email they might not see it until tomorrow. That’s why you send the text to get the conversation started at a convenient time.

Any conversation that requires any degree of thought or analysis is probably going to be by email. Not all. But most. That’s because I prefer typing thoughtfully and fully about any important topic, especially if I am advising. I know I can be persnickety, and I make no apologies for that. It is how I function. I am a problem solver, but that doesn’t mean I can drop what I’m doing right now to hear a problem. I might be able to right away, but I might not be.

I am least available on phone calls. I don’t even know where my phone is half the time. I leave it in my coat pocket, then I leave my coat in my bedroom or office. Or I leave it in my glove box or console in the car. If you try to call me, the odds are overwhelming I won’t even know until hours or a day later. But texting me is the best way to get me. Why? Because when I am on my computer I have a little, tiny icon that shows me when someone has texted me. Now, I may not see it right away, but I’m way more likely to see that text than I am to hear that phone ring. Oh, yeah, I should probably tell you I have the ringer on my phone turned OFF. I literally have to have my phone ON me to know you’re calling.

In summary, there is no way to make anything around me buzz, ring, click, or go off in noise when you try to reach me.

I am very communicative, but on my terms. I try to allow others the same distance. If I know someone does not like being called on the phone I will never call them unless it is a real emergency.

This is one of those columns I write mostly for myself. If anyone else likes it, that’s a bonus. Maybe you will see some of yourself in my persnickety ways.