JIM “PAPPY” MOORE: Colder Than a Well Digger’s Behind

When I was growing up we used to say of really cold days “it’s colder than a well digger’s ass!” If you have actually been down in a well, you know it is naturally cold down there. With water seeping out and into the well, and your jeans getting wet, it doesn’t take long to get a real first class chill. It’s the kind of cold you don’t forget. Thus the saying.

We have had some seriously cold weather this winter. Here we are spring just around the corner in a few weeks, and we are still having cold spells where the temperature drops down into the twenties. Enough of this global warming!

Oh, I forgot. They had to get rid of the “global warming” nonsense after the global temperature peaked about ten years ago. So they switched to the always flexible “Climate Change.” You know what weather is? It’s when weather gets warm, then gets hot, then gets cooler, then gets cold. It’s called the FOUR SEASONS. We have them every year.

You and I both know this has been going on our entire lives. If you’re like me and have lived in a number of different decades, you know that some summers on planet Earth are hotter than others, and some winters on planet Earth are colder than others. You can recall when in the summer of 2011 it got so hot and dry we had lakes receding terribly and forest fires when we didn’t usually have them.

How long have we had that saying about our Lone Star State? You know the one. “If you don’t like the weather in Texas, wait a bit. It’ll change soon enough.”

Living in Texas is living with the seasons. Sometimes they give us nice surprises. I like it when Texas surprises us with a sunny day in the 60s for Thanksgiving or Christmas. Those are wonderful to get outside and throw the football.  What a marvelous time to be a Texan.

Then every few years, Texas surprises us with a snow around Christmas or New Year’s. Usually not enough to do any real damage. Just enough to cancel school and let all the kids – young and old – get outside and throw some snow balls. We had it this year, praise the Lord! Who doesn’t like snow days, except maybe people who have to get out and feed cattle in it?

I favor summer over winter, because it’s easier to survive in air conditioning in hot weather than with heat in cold winter. This is because hot air rises. In the summer weather, the air conditioning comes out and settles down where we sit or sleep. That means we stay cool inside. But in winter when we have to heat up our cold houses, the opposite is true. All the hot air goes up to the ceiling where it doesn’t do us any good. We sit down here or sleep down here where the cold air still gets us! And the bills for heating always seem to be higher than the bills for cooling for those very differences.

When it comes to weather, I’m happy with just about anything that doesn’t involve a tornado, or a hurricane, or flooded roads, or downed power lines. I can wait it out, otherwise. If my water, electric, internet, and phone keep working, well partner, that’s just another day in paradise we call Texas.