My Dad was Too Trusting
Aug 12, 2014 | 1486 views | 2 2 comments | 13 13 recommendations | email to a friend | print
It’s my birthday this week. I am so happy to be getting older and wiser. I hope I have enough birthdays to play with my future grandchildren. However, I realize not only do I have to take care of myself, I have to make sure my children are well taken care of.

Has anyone heard about the fire challenge and the pass out challenge that is going around on social media? Basically, people are setting themselves on fire or making themselves pass out and video taping it. How foolish.

I have to admit though as a child I played the pass out game. My single father would leave me at home at night by myself often. It was usually when he went bowling or had a weekend date. It is funny how a child can be so smart and so dumb at the same time.

I was very smart when it came to planning when my friends could come over. Usually I could have them at the house 20 minutes after my dad left. I always made sure it was over 15 minutes incase he forgot something and had to turn around. I also knew how to plan for everyone to leave before my dad got home. My dad never really set any rules about what I could and couldn’t do while he was gone. He knew I might have a friend over or go to a friend’s house but there were no specifics of what couldn’t be done.

One night, I had about five friends over. A couple of girls and a few boys. I don’t know who started it but we decided to play the pass out game. I never heard of it before but I was a willing participant which was very dumb of me. The first girl played didn’t pass out but it was still fun trying.

I didn’t actually think anyone was going to pass out. I thought it was an old wives tale like the sleeper hold in wrestling. I wanted to go next but since a girl went first, they said it was time for a boy to go. The boys then proceeded to play the pass out game and I freaked out when the boy’s eyes rolled back in his head as he dropped to the ground.

Me and one of the other girls freaked out while everyone else seemed to laugh and cheer. The boy slowly got up and said he was fine but he wasn’t. There was blood everywhere. At first we didn’t know where it was coming from.

He had cracked his head open when he fell. We immediately rushed him home. When we got to his house his mom also freaked out. She started screaming and asked him what happened and he told the truth, sort of.

“We were playing a game and I fell and hit my head,” he said.

I just stood there with blood on me not saying a word. They rushed him to the car and to the hospital. I then rushed back home because in all the excitement, I forgot about the time. I knew I only had about 20 minutes before my dad got home.

I ran back as fast as I could. I don’t think I have ever ran that fast. As I turned the corner I was so relieved because my dad’s car wasn’t in the driveway. I hurried up in the house and cleaned up the blood from the pass out game. As soon as I threw the bloody towels in my closet, I heard my dad pull up. He was never the wiser and to this day he has never heard this story.

This is the thing, you have to teach your children not to be foolish. You can’t always be there with them but you have to make sure there are rules in place. You have to make sure that even though you are not with them, your voice is. Children all make mistakes. I’ve made plenty including playing the pass out game. However, if my dad had been more aware of leaving me alone and made more strict rules, I would have never played the pass out game.

If you haven’t heard about the pass out game or the setting your self on fire challenge, you should do a little research. It is very dangerous. My friend, Charles, who passed out ended up getting 10 stitches that night. I was relieved he was okay but I learned from my dumb mistake and never did anything like that again.

As I grow older and wiser, I know that as a parent it is my job to teach my children not to be foolish. I would like to point out my father was a good parent but a little too trusting. Just because you think your child is smart and well behaved, doesn’t mean they won’t make foolish decisions. You have to stay on top of them. You have to know what is going on in the world. You must stay one step ahead of them at all times. If my dad, just once would have told me he was coming home at 11 and came home at 9 instead, I don’t think I would have ever participated in the passing out game.

I hope my dad doesn’t read this and I hope my children don’t either because I definitely plan on coming home two hours early often.

© 2014, MaLu Bradford Beyonce, All Rights Reserved.

You may reach MaLu Bradford Beyonce at

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August 10, 2014
I am very sorry to hear this. Yes, it is important for Parents to know what is going on in their child and their child's friends life. This "game" has been around for years and parents need to tell their children not play it. I am so sorry for your loss. Hopefully, you sharing your story will let people know how serious this deadly game is
Anne Hilary Phillips
August 10, 2014
I wish I could have read this piece twenty years ago, before my son, Mike, played the game and died. He also banged his head but it happened outside where the ground was so much harder. I sincerely hope lots of people read what you wrote. The choking game is definitely not a game and is very very deadly.